Zia Hyder

 

My Mother

 

                      

                 ( 1 )

 

In the sleepless night, in the darkness

As thick as her own sorrow,

Perhaps she is reading the Koran in lamplight.

 

Quietly she rises and moves into the room

Where lies the hard bed on which I used to sleep,

Silently,  without noise, she touches the pillow,

As she used to touch my head when I was young.

 

She would be startled if someone found her out,

She would blush, and with shy smile

Return to her seat near the lamp,

And begin to read the Holy faith again,

Her tremulous voice sending ripples    

Into the thick darkness of the night.

 

Perhaps her mind would travel

And two tears form in her palsied eyes ;

 

And she would raise her hands in fearless faith,

In total abandon.

And offer a prayer for a flower, a dove and a sheaf of corn.

                     

                          ( 2 )

  Come close to me, my son, my boy,

Sit on the bed, close to me, place your hand on my

                                                                forehead…

Yes, it burns, my whole body burns ;

I have a fever ; the world burns, it hasn’t rained

                                                                   for days ;

 

Listen into my bosom –it’s dry ;

There’s no rain in the sky, no rain on the earth ;

I burn, the earth burns ;

But I have things to tell you, wishes to tell…

It will rain next year, or the next, somebody it will ;

And then the plant at the doorstep will flower, I

                                                                 planted it—

Do you years ago,

When I had just come to this house as a twelve-

                                                            years-old bride ;    

Why hasn’t it flowered in the morning  ?

It will somebody, when the rain will come ;

And when it does, place the first flower at my grave,

                                                            Where my head rests ;

When the rain comes, the fields will be full of

                                                               harvest ;

You will all sing, play on the flute ;

And then you must fix the marriage of Chotku ;

The bride must herself clean the courtyard, as I’ve

                                                              always done ;

She must draw alpona at her the door,

With the designs of doves and corn-sheaves ;                                        

 

My Koran Shariff and the betel-nut pot, mine own,

Are left for the bride ;

And , yes, before I forget,

There is a small tin-case under this bed, beneath my

                                                                          pillow ;

 

This, too, is for her ;

Shall I tell what’s in it ?

Nothing much, but my everything—

Petals, raindrops, sheaves of paddy, a song,

Lots and lots of wishes, caged in , shy lonely wishes ;

 

These are not for you, forsaken by luck,

And plenty of rains ;

And in whose hands these shy desires will take wings,

Turn into butterflies,

And wander all over the house, and multiply

 

And then, please, have a milad held for me.

Mother, mother, as you die, should I tell you

It will not rain in this land,

For many years it won’t ;

Why should you not die knowing that

It may next year or the next ?

 

                                       Translated by Bhabani Sengupta

 

 

 

Zia Haider (1936-). Poet. Poetry: Ektarate Kanna (1963), Dur Theke Dekha (1977), Amar Palatak Chhaya. Essay: Theatrer Katha (vol-1.2.3.4), Bishwanatya.